mean girls

i know i know
a double post
within' minutes
but it's F1 race week
every company out there ain't givin' a shit

after a sinister post
here's a pleasant one:
'chicks i would marry at a drop of a hat (& i'm sure you would too)
& i don't mean: "man, i wanna hit that"
but: "i wanna hold your hand, long walks down the beach, the works etc"
so in order of marriage...

5. sienna miller

instantbeauty.wordpress.com
if she hadn't screwed up so much lately
(after gettin' screwed over by jude)
this english rose might...
hell
i'll still marry her

4. jessica alba

aolcdn.com
got to be the hottest milf in the world right now
or maybe ever
she would probably be 3rd
if not for the fact she's actually married
but i'll still be a happy stepdad nonetheless

3.kristin kreuk

l.yimg.com
*aaahhh... kristin
how can you not love her?
*aaahhh...
how can you look at her & not think:
"i better not fuckin' screw this up, i need to marry her"
*aaahhh...

2. keeley hazell

theworldsbestever.com
before you say it's all about the boobs
i'm more smitten with her british accent, angelic face etc
okay, okay & her body
if i was joe cole
i'd dedicate every goal and stepover to her
it was worth gettin' beaten up over her eh joe?

1. lindsay lohan

topnews.in
before anyone gets on my back
hear me out
i've always had a thing for lindsay
it was the same with tara reid
who would have been a contender
if not for the massive shit she did with herself
hey i don't mind the rehab
just not relentless botched up surgeries
back to lindsay: i love you
but seriously
she looks gorgeous with any hair colour
and she's a lesbian
top that

special mention: cheryl tweedy & kate beckinsale

*disclaimer
all the chicks on this post have been chosen
based on the fact i'll never get them
if i somehow manage to
i shall be absolved of all blame
for the things i would do to accomplish that fact

please mtv, give me a ride

you've done it
i've done it
we've all had our moments as ugly singaporeans
cutting queues, chopping seats and other glorious antics
my rant today: who dares wins (or gets on the train)

i used to think who would want to drive to work
petrol, parking, erp (it has come to the point where they are buildin' gantries for fun)
but after startin' work
mrt rides instill fear in me
of unleashin' the ugly singaporean hidden within
unless i'm lucky
i miss an average of 3 trains
because i can't bear to push & shove my way in
and risk gettin' sliced by the closin' doors
*beep beep beep* doors slicin'...
maybe they should build erp gantries on train doors
to control traffic
that would be groovy

but like today
after like 4 trains passed me by
& 1 muthafooker who stepped in front of me
i decided to force my way in
& shit i hated that
how can people bear with this
& not want to buy a bike/car

even if i'm stuck in traffic
definitely beats havin' my face plastered to the door
& thrusted by some fat dude's belly
or a ginormous (this is an actual word now) bag

& for those people readin' a book
or "i can't read my free Today/mypaper some other time"
when the trains are at their brims
i hope the train comes to a sudden halt
and you get sliced by your book/paper

please mtv, give me a ride

because some things can't be taught

got to check this website out: Uncoached

especially where he jacks the myspace profiles

chore of the century

a) Answer the questions below, do a Google Image search with your answer, take a picture from the first page of results, and do it with minimal words of explanation.

b) Tag 5 other people to do the same once you’ve finished answering every question.

1. The age you’ll be on your next birthday

1. The age you’ll be on your next birthday

2. A place you’d like to travel to

3. Your favourite place

4. Your favourite food

5. Your favourite pet

what i want but won't get

6. Your favourite colour combination

7. Your favourite piece of clothing

le shorts

8. Your favourite TV show

&

9. First name of your significant other

10. The town in which your live

near my bus stop

11. Your first job

12. Your dream job

13. A bad habit you have

i admit it. how about you?

14. Your worst fear

blind as a bat

15. What you’d like to do before you die

newcastle 5 man u 0

dirt belongs in the trash. (mustaffic, 2008)
classic

i'm not taggin' anybody to do this
because this is a chore
that's why I got sands to do it
;)

the day football died

a sad day in football
for newcastle football at least
kevin keegan has left the building

while i didn't agree with king kev
over retainin' joey bastard
& 12m for james milner was too good to say no
bein' undermined by incompetents like ashley, wise & jimenez
was seriously, how shall i put it...
fucked up.

if wise takes over
i will seriously consider stop supportin' newcastle
& switch to fulham (same team colours, jimmy bullard etc)
wise couldn't even coach a team
out of league 2
how can he face powerhouses stoke & hull?
he wasn't much of a player
just a thug
maybe joey bastard would be the new skipper

i read that the players are ready to slap in
transfer requests in jan if kev leaves
go ahead lads
& sign for fulham
or man city (next favourite club for football fans i.e. spain fans)

a moment of silence
for football owners in the EPL
who have a director of football